Gwynny’s Broken Marriage (and How a Broken Floral Arrangement Saved It)
Photo by Becca Tapert
It was always ‘Gwynny and Nina’, short for Gwyndolin and Janina, since first grade. We’d become best friends and have stayed best friends throughout college and into our married lives. Although how long Gwynny will stay married will remain to be seen. It’s a troubled one, and due largely to Gwynny having turned into a real bitch.
I began seeing signs, a couple of years ago, of my friend, a forever optimist, turning slowly into someone who would find fault in virtually everything. That included her husband and her family, and even with her own precious business, for which she lived and breathed.
But let’s back up. Before you can get a grasp of how things are, let me tell you how things were, how Gwynny and I used to be.
All through grade school we sat near each other in class passing notes back and forth behind the teacher’s back. Gwynny was always the one to make me giggle. We were both considered ‘free spirits’ — not the kind to buck the system, but we would often go against the grain, having our own little secrets, stories, and adventures. We saw the world in a different light than how our other classmates seemed to.
In Junior High School, a new girl moved to the area named Tabatha, who we embraced as a kindred spirit, and we three became a unit.
Gwynny had long silky white-blonde hair past her shoulders, with beautiful blue eyes and a mischievous smile. Tabatha, or Tab, she was soon called, had flaming red hair, green eyes, lots of freckles, and an infectious smile. She always seemed happy, which was what drew us to her, and she wasn’t opposed to a bit of mischief, either.
Me. I was a cross between the two. I had strawberry-blonde hair, a smattering of freckles across my nose, but I had a more serious look about me, making people wonder what was going on behind my green eyes. Yet I was quick to laugh and was always lending a helping hand to anyone who needed it.
In college, I went into law, which was not a surprise to anyone, since I was always the arbitrator when disagreements came up. Tabatha and Gwyndolin went into business and started their own successful companies after graduating. We all were ready to conquer the world — at least the business end of it.
Tabatha, being the creative one in school, opened a high-end florist’s shop that catered to people who liked exotic flowers and unusual arrangements.
Gwyndolin’s company was making natural cosmetics, having their own special formulas.
Both women were amazingly successful.
We each met our mates, fell in love while in college, and all married the same year. We even had our children the same years — each having a boy and a girl. Tabatha did it the easy way and had twins…well, easy in only having to go through one pregnancy.
Because we were all successful in our careers, we were able to hire live-in caretakers who also cooked. Life was good for us. That is, until competitors began to nudge into Gwynny’s territory and she became another person.
I tried to tell her that there was enough room for everybody, and all she needed to do was convince people that her product was the best and keep changing her advertising to make her line look new.
She was too pissed to listen, and she began to stew and brew and retaliate.
Her new attitude was not only hurting our friendship it was hurting her marriage as well. It got so bad that Jeromy, her husband, moved out, which nearly broke her, but mainly pissed her off. “How could he?” she’d whine.
She ended up taking antidepressants and wouldn’t listen to my sage advice, until I finally told her to call me when she was ready to make a change in her attitude. I didn’t see or hear from her for several months. I felt bad, not wanting to abandon her, but she needed to work things out in her own head and decide for herself when she needed my help.
Photo by Elisa Ventur
When the delivery truck finally arrived and unloaded two more of the magnificent white grass backdrops, Tab was with them. Before setting them in place Tab stood them all together and looked at the two originals and then at the two new ones. She said to Gwynn, “Can you tell which are the newest ones and which are the originals?”
Gwynn, not having seen the new ones come in looked them over carefully and pointed to the newest plants and said, “These are the original ones and these — she pointed — are the old ones.”
“No, my friend, it is just the opposite, which tells me that you have gotten yourself in such a perfectionistic snit lately that no one can stand to be around you, and this just proves my point. You just spend two thousand extra dollars for no reason whatsoever except to satisfy your own built-up ego because you don’t think anyone can be right but you and everything has to be perfect.”
She stopped for a breath and continued, “And while I’m on a rant, I’m going to tell you something else that’s been on my mind. You and your husband were made for each other. You’re good together in every way, and you know it, but you’ve gotten so high and mighty lately that you don’t think anyone is good enough for you. This charade today only proves that you might have an inkling that you don’t want to lose this guy, but you don’t truly feel it down deep inside. I see it in your selfish eyes. You need to take these floral arrangements as a lesson for you to constantly remind yourself you need to start thinking of people and things other than just yourself and consider the fact that you may be wrong occasionally. Realize that it’s okay to be wrong and start remembering those who’ve helped you through your trials and tribs to get you where you are.
“You used to be the best friend a person could ask for, along with Nina. You both helped make my life what it is with encouragement and love. But now it’s become all about you. You can’t keep taking and not giving back. We want your friendship back. We want things to get back to normal without your needing to take valium to get through your day. And your husband needs a wife who can love and appreciate him.”
Gwynny looked at us both, tears running down her face. She shook her head and then held her arms open to offer a long-needed embrace, which we quickly accepted.
“Thank you, my dear friends, for not giving up on me totally. I can see the problem now. You have opened my eyes, or these beautiful plants have opened my eyes. I will stand proudly in front of all of them when I vow to my husband to get back to normal and to give him all that he deserves. I think I will retire as CEO of the company and let someone else have the headaches.”
“Yes!” was the collective response from both Tab and me.
“It will be hard, but I’m ready to give it a shot,” Gwynn stated. “My family needs me, and I need them. I also need you two.” Gwynny wiped her eyes. “Thank you for showing me what I haven’t been able to see. Now let’s get these lovely grasses in place where they belong so that I can get remarried.”
The costly, but so beautiful feathery grasses with the orchids and hibiscus that became a broader backdrop was the perfect setting for two people who would always be in love and were once again announcing it to the world. At least to the fifty-plus friends in attendance.
Photo by Joanna Kosinska
When the delivery truck finally arrived and unloaded two more of the magnificent white grass backdrops, Tab was with them. Before setting them in place Tab stood them all together and looked at the two originals and then at the two new ones. She said to Gwynn, “Can you tell which are the newest ones and which are the originals?”
Gwynn, not having seen the new ones come in looked them over carefully and pointed to the newest plants and said, “These are the original ones and these — she pointed — are the old ones.”
“No, my friend, it is just the opposite, which tells me that you have gotten yourself in such a perfectionistic snit lately that no one can stand to be around you, and this just proves my point. You just spend two thousand extra dollars for no reason whatsoever except to satisfy your own built-up ego because you don’t think anyone can be right but you and everything has to be perfect.”
She stopped for a breath and continued, “And while I’m on a rant, I’m going to tell you something else that’s been on my mind. You and your husband were made for each other. You’re good together in every way, and you know it, but you’ve gotten so high and mighty lately that you don’t think anyone is good enough for you. This charade today only proves that you might have an inkling that you don’t want to lose this guy, but you don’t truly feel it down deep inside. I see it in your selfish eyes. You need to take these floral arrangements as a lesson for you to constantly remind yourself you need to start thinking of people and things other than just yourself and consider the fact that you may be wrong occasionally. Realize that it’s okay to be wrong and start remembering those who’ve helped you through your trials and tribs to get you where you are.
“You used to be the best friend a person could ask for, along with Nina. You both helped make my life what it is with encouragement and love. But now it’s become all about you. You can’t keep taking and not giving back. We want your friendship back. We want things to get back to normal without your needing to take valium to get through your day. And your husband needs a wife who can love and appreciate him.”
Gwynny looked at us both, tears running down her face. She shook her head and then held her arms open to offer a long-needed embrace, which we quickly accepted.
“Thank you, my dear friends, for not giving up on me totally. I can see the problem now. You have opened my eyes, or these beautiful plants have opened my eyes. I will stand proudly in front of all of them when I vow to my husband to get back to normal and to give him all that he deserves. I think I will retire as CEO of the company and let someone else have the headaches.”
“Yes!” was the collective response from both Tab and me.
“It will be hard, but I’m ready to give it a shot,” Gwynn stated. “My family needs me, and I need them. I also need you two.” Gwynny wiped her eyes. “Thank you for showing me what I haven’t been able to see. Now let’s get these lovely grasses in place where they belong so that I can get remarried.”
The costly, but so beautiful feathery grasses with the orchids and hibiscus that became a broader backdrop was the perfect setting for two people who would always be in love and were once again announcing it to the world. At least to the fifty-plus friends in attendance.
Photo by Avinash Kumar